Lets share jokes amongst ourselves

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Offline LWSpevack

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Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #60 on: February 17, 2007, 12:54:19 AM »
Everything You Need To Know About Health Care - From The AARP!!!

MEDICAL INSURANCE EXPLAINED (Research done by the AARP Legal Department)

Q.   What does HMO stand for?

A.   This is actually a variation of the phrase, "HEY MOE."  Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Moe of the Three Stooges, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eye.


Q.   I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want?

A.    Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents.  Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors in the plan.  The doctors basically fall into two categories: those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer participating in the plan.  But don't worry, the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half-day's drive away and a diploma from a third world country.


Q.   Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?

A.   No. Only those you need.


Q.   Can I get coverage for my preexisting conditions?

A.   Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment.


Q.   What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine?

A.   You'll need to find alternative forms of payment.

 
Q.   My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand.  I tried the generic medication, but it gave me a stomachache.  What should I do?

A.   Poke yourself in the eye.

 
Q.   What if I'm away from home and I get sick?

A.   You really shouldn't do that.


Q.   I think I need to see a specialist, but my doctor insists he can handle my problem.  Can a general practitioner really perform a heart transplant right in his/her office?

A. Hard to say, but considering that all you're risking is the $20 co-payment, there's no harm in giving it a shot.


Q. Will health care be different in the next decade?

A. No, but if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then.


To Your Good Health (because as you'll see, you'll need it!)


If you don't live for something ... you'll die for nothing.

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Offline LWSpevack

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Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #61 on: February 19, 2007, 03:18:55 AM »
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.

The blonde cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license.

She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.

"What does it look like?" she finally asked.

The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."

The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman.

"Here it is," she said.

The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go.  I didn't realize you were a cop."
If you don't live for something ... you'll die for nothing.

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Offline nice friend

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Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #62 on: April 10, 2009, 08:53:56 PM »
HI Buddies,
i found this thread and want to put my Participation in it , soo here's it is....

Happy Married Couple
Once upon a time a married couple celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary. They were famous in the city for not having a single conflict in all of their 25 years of married life. Local newspaper editors had gathered at the occasion to find out the secret of their well known “happy marriage”.

Editor: “Sir. It’s amazing. How did you make this possible?”

The husband recalling his old honeymoon days said: “We had been to Shimla after our marriage. Having chosen to go horse riding, we both started the ride on different horses. My horse was pretty okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy one. On the way ahead, her horse jumped suddenly, toppling my wife topple over. Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse’s back and said “This is your first time”. She again climbed the horse and continued with the ride. After a while, it happened again. This time too she kept her calm and said “This is your second time” and continued. When the horse dropped her the third time, she silently took out a revolver from her purse and shot the horse dead!!

I shouted at my wife: “What did you do you psycho. You killed the poor animal. Are you crazy?” She gave a silent look and said: “This is your first time!!!”

Husband: “That’s it. We have been happy ever since. “

Keep Smiling
Best Regards
Take Care
Umair
Sometimes , God breaks our spirit to save our soul.
Sometimes , He breaks our heart to make us whole.
Sometimes , He sends us pain so we can be stronger.
Sometimes , He sends us failure so we can be humble.
Sometimes , He sends us illness so we can take better care of our selves.
Sometimes , He takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything we have.

===========
Umair

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Offline Manal

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Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #63 on: April 11, 2009, 02:05:24 AM »
 :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl

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Offline Zaini

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Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #64 on: April 11, 2009, 07:24:41 AM »
I couldn't decide for a moment that where should i post it,in "Quote of the day" or "Jokes"  :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl



                        

Zaini.


^*^Xaini^*^

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Offline nice friend

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  • If I Can, Why Not You??... If I Can U TOO !!!...
Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #65 on: April 11, 2009, 08:43:31 AM »
 :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl
Good One Zaini , :thumbup
After All " BIL'LI,  Shair ki Khala hai " ( Cat is the Aunt of Lion , did I translated right ??? )  hahahaha .... a Good message with gr8 explaining Image .....
i think this cat will be thinking that,
Quote
" Think highly of yourself, for the world takes you at your own estimate! "
:teehee ....

Best Regards
Take Care
Umair
Sometimes , God breaks our spirit to save our soul.
Sometimes , He breaks our heart to make us whole.
Sometimes , He sends us pain so we can be stronger.
Sometimes , He sends us failure so we can be humble.
Sometimes , He sends us illness so we can take better care of our selves.
Sometimes , He takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything we have.

===========
Umair

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Offline cherieann

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Re: Lets share jokes amongst ourselves
« Reply #66 on: May 04, 2009, 10:00:59 AM »
Andy - love your dictionary terms. :rotfl :rotfl
Thalassaemia is a lifestyle not a burden.

 

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